The MRI, MRA and the angiogram that Serine’s neurologist recommended didn’t sound too reassuring. The last grand mal
seizure had been severe and had occurred when she was getting ready to get into her car to run some errands. Thank God, she had the seizure before getting in the car. Grand mal seizures are a horrid sight for anyone unfamiliar with them. The body’s muscles tense up and the convulsions occur while the mind loses consciousness for the short period of time when the seizure occurs. As Serine seized she let out a horrible scream that had awoken her daughter whose bedroom window looked out to the front of their home. Her daughter had immediately run and turned her mother on her right side and had made sure that she was not biting down on her tongue which sometimes happens in these horrible episodes. Hannah, her daughter, was used to looking out for her mother during these horrible episodes since she was old enough to realize what was happening. Her grandmother, Serine’s mother, had given her implicit instructions on what to do.
As far as Serine could remember, the last seizure had occurred a year prior, but this one was severe. Hannah urged Serine to visit her neurologist, a visit that was long overdue. The neurologist recommended several screenings to figure out what was happening and the test results showed two aneurysms that needed to be treated as soon as possible. As she contemplated the ramifications of all of this, Serine couldn’t help but reflect upon her life. Will it end here? How much time did she have to get her life in order?? She thought about the living will that she kept procrastinating about preparing and decided it needed to be the first order of business. She wanted her brother Omar to be the executor of her will because he would follow it without hesitation. I have to be specific, there can’t be room for misinterpretation, she thought …
When she dies, she wanted her debts paid and her retirement money, the only money she had, to be divided up among her family according to Islamic law. She told her children that she wanted her body to be washed and buried Islamically and she wanted her daughters and close friends, Rema and Miriam, to be there for her burial preparation. Muslims usually prepare the dead simply, with a quick turnaround between death and burial, generally within twenty four hours. No reason to draw this out, with all of the preparations that need to be made and family and friends needing to be notified. She wanted her funeral to be simple and only wanted her family members, close friends and specified members of her mosque to say a prayer for her at her grave site. All these wishes she knew her children would respect and she had no qualms about their following through with them despite their grief. Wow, she thought, this would make them have to be strong and handle a very tough situation. She was confident that they would adhere to her wishes for she knew that she had raised them to be responsible. As her mother told Serine, her children didn’t really have a childhood; they had had to be very responsible at a young age.
Her situation was not unlike many others. As a matter of fact it was the typical cliché: the doctor gave her bad news and her whole life passed before her. Serine is the eldest and only daughter of Samy and Sara Abdel Hakeem who were granted immigrant visas in 1973. The doors of immigration were wide open to professionals at that time. America had enough laborers and didn’t need any more. Serine’s father, a 40 year old mechanical engineer, wanted to start his own business and his hope then was that America was the place to do so. Her mother, like many middle class women of her age, had graduated from college and instead of pursuing a career had opted to be a wife and mother first and foremost. She worked because she needed to do something for herself but her first responsibility was raising her four children. Serine, her oldest and only daughter, and her three sons were the focus of her attention, aw was of course her husband. Serine learned to be an independent woman because of her mother. She pulled no punches and kept everyone in her household in check. The focus was not about individual family members, it was about what was best for the entire family. Serine grew up seeing this in practice. Her mom spent her time dealing with individual family members as needed. She could assess their needs and take care of them. Serine marveled at how her mother could work full time, manage the household, and take care of everyone. As an adult, she saw herself like her mom. The only difference was that she was not as obsessive about everything, or at least she tried not to be.
