Life Skills
Always have two pockets. These are for the If’s in your life.
What does this mean? This is a saying that my mom said to me day in and out. Huh? What mama? Why do I literally need two pockets ?! Ok! Ok! I get it Mama!
But those words are very very wise and important words to abide by because it’s meaning could mentally, physically and monetarily save your life.
It means to have reserve. A reserve in case something happens, in case a person doesn’t keep their promise, in case of an emergency, in case you have to feed yourself or your family, in case you have an accident, in case you get sick, and so on.
As we all embark on our lives we are always faced with trials and tribulations in which things may not go as expected.
‘Yes Baba I want to marry him. He is a Muslim, a good man, has high education and he has a good paying job. His family is Masha Allah. Please. I wish to marry him. Although his daughter hadn’t completed her undergraduate studies; The father consents as his daughter has spoken true. The father has met this potential husband and is happy to accept him as his son.
They wed, go on an amazing honey moon, move into a very nice home and his daughter is well endowed allowing her to stay at home. Soon she is pregnant and because of morning sickness and tiredness she decides not to finish her degree. So she enjoys being pregnant. 9 months pass and she gives birth. Allhamdulillah! Everyone is overjoyed little did anyone know tragedy would strike. Her beloved husband got into an accident and he is not able to work. Bills mounting and his office has left him high and dry. Nothing. No compensation which means no money. Ah! She needs money. She needs to work. But she hadn’t worked a day in her life. And without a degree of some sort the only jobs paid so little with so much time. Now she had a baby and a husband to care for….’
We hear these tragic stories today. In this day and age where you can learn anything – anywhere this story sounds ridiculous. But it isn’t. I know persons who are in these situations that could have been prevented if she had a second pocket.
How to know what your second pocket is? Ok. So you are in school to become a doctor. Don’t forget to learn some other skill that you can ‘fall back on’. Let say you are a great cook. Why not take formal classes and get certified as a Baker or chef? This doesn’t mean you will become a professional chef BUT let say you marry an engineer and he has to take a post in another country where you can’t practice. Well because you are a certified chef or baker maybe you can teach? Make a catering business on the side. Life is NEVER how you think it is. Seriously.
With that in mind – here are some of my favorite (life) second pockets:
- Money saved
- Typing fast and accurate
- Computer skills
- Organizational skills
- Cooking
- Teaching skills – any subject!
- Sewing
- Quran recitation
- Public speaking
- Languages
- And so much more!
My favorite (Akherat) second pockets:
- Reading Quran – even just 10 minutes
- Smiling
- Saying nice words
- Thinking good thoughts, positive thoughts
- Thinking and doing good deeds for those closest to us first
- Thinking and doing good deeds for others
- Du’a
- Dzikir – Rememberance of Allah
- and so much more!
Being independent doesn’t mean women’s liberation. Islam has already liberated us. So being independent means that you know and can fend for yourself in this world. Not to be used as way to disrespect the husband.
